Va'Yeira: using discretion

Parshas Va'Yeira

In 19:37, after the destruction of S'dom and the surrounding cities, the daughters of Lot decided they were the only survivors and they had to repopulate the world. The problem was the only man left alive was Lot, their father. That makes the relationship incestuous and forbidden. There were not other choices, so they went ahead, got him drunk and got themselves pregnant.

The older daughter named her child Moav, because he was born from her father. The younger daughter named her child Ben Ami.

Rashi says the older daughter was immodest in announcing to the world what she had done and therefore that is why later the Jews are told they can wage battle with Moav. The younger daughter was more modest by hiding the source, and that is why later the Jews are commanded to not fight with Amon.

We see from this story that sometimes you might be in a bind. You might be in a situation in which you have to do something unpleasant and wrong. But you might do it because you have no other choice.

So you do it. You don't have to be proud of it though. Keep it quiet. Keep it private. Don't announce your shameful act, that might even have been justified at the time, to the world.

Use a little discretion.

my responsibility

Parshat Va'Yeishev

We read about the incident in which the angels show up in Lot's house in S'dom.. Lot brings them in. The people of the town hear that Lot has guests and they come to "arrest" them. It is unclear what they really wanted to do with the guests, some opinions say sodomistic purposes, others say torture. Lot says in 19:8 not to take the guests rather I have two daughters, take them.

How could Lot offer his daughters to them? If you say he felt responsible for hsi guests and could not give them up at any cost (as Rashi says) and therefore he had to offer his daughters in their places, should he not feel responsible for his daughters well being as well? He should have offered himself in their place!

Maybe he knew they would not take him because he was one of them, so the only alternative was to offer his daughters. I just fail to understand how a father could offer his daughters to such an evil plan..

important decisions

Parshat Lech L'cha

Look how important a decision can be. In 13:8-12 we read about Avram and Lot splitting ways. Avram let Lot choose first which direction he wanted to go and Avram would go the other way.

What does Lot choose? How does he come to that decision? The Torah tells us he lifted up his eyes, saw the beautiful grazing land with rivers and babbling brooks and lush grass and fertile land and chose that direction.

Nothing else mattered. He did not consider the community or the type of people that lived there. He did not consider where he would want to raise and educate his children and in what society he would live. It did not matter that he would become a resident of a place like S'dom.

None of it mattered as long as he had good grazing land for his sheep. He was impulsive.

And look where it got him. We all know how the story progresses and what happens in S'dom.

It is important not to be impulsive, but make your decisions with careful consideration.